San Fran Trip

So, only a few days after getting back from the East Coast, we packed up our bags again for a weekend trip to San Francisco. It probably was not the best timing, but it couldn't be helped since we were going down for a baby shower and 40th birthday bash. When we were finished packing, we had the baby stroller/car seat, the Pack n' Play, two small rolling suitcases and ESK's booster seat (for eating). That's six bulky items. We need a pack mule caravan and several servants to travel with ESK. SK and I estimated that if we were traveling just the two of us, we would only be taking one carry-on bag for the weekend!

I was so crazed the day of our flight getting everything ready (presents needed to be wrapped, baby food needed to be prepared, etc.) I forgot to eat anything all day. And then when we finally got to the airport, I realized I had not packed a single diaper. Not even in the diaper bag. And of course, ESK had a nice little poopie sitting in her diaper. Luckily, she wasn't upset about it.

Once we got to SF, it was good times (after a good diaper change). We had fun seeing old friends and ESK got a lot of attention. While we lived in SF, we had frequent get-togethers with a few other families and we called them "family night". We miss them now that we're in Portland. So, we spent almost every meal with these families. Not an easy feat considering there were probably at least 20 of us (including the kids). The pictures to the left is of ESK with her little friends EP and LH.


Mommy Meltdown
So, while I was packing for my San Francisco trip, I had a minor mommy meltdown. The 40th birthday party was the first social event I had to dress for since before I had ESK. And of course, I had NOTHING to wear. Some of my clothes don't fit me anymore, and others were either too conservative (more suitable for the office) or too revealing (fine when I was single, but now that I'm a mom...). It's not like I've resorted to wearing "mom jeans" or anything like that, but I was just looking for something slightly dressy and just hip enough. I unhappily ended up wearing something I used to wear to the office and complained bitterly to SK, "I look like a nun!"

Looking back, I think my foul mood partly stemmed from my lack of food that day (remember, I hadn't eaten anything all day long). But frankly, I haven't been doing much personal maintenance since ESK got here. I don't usually care what I wear on an everyday basis and just throw on a t-shirt and jeans. My eyebrows are turning into strips of overgrown forests on my forehead. Not to mention my hairy legs. Who sees them anyway?

So, I'm going to start trying to take care of myself a little better. Eat a little more fruit instead of cookies. Drink more water. Pluck my eyebrows. Try to wear my nicer clothes when I run errands. Maybe I'll be in a better mood for myself and for ESK?

Here's ESK getting some work done before she goes to bed.

Back East

It's been a few days since we got back from our East Coast trip. ESK is still a bit jet-lagged and has been crankier than usual. We're also concerned because it seems to be effecting her eating. I hope it's just because she's out of sorts.

Our trip East was tiring but a lot of fun. Originally, SK and I made the trip to go to a wedding, but I stayed another week to spend time with friends and family. Both sets of grandparent are in Philly, so it was an effort to make sure everyone got their fill of ESK. Also, I hadn't seen some of my close friends since my wedding more than a year ago. And some of them had not even met ESK!

My sisters also came down to Philly to see ESK. It was such a treat. Little GMK wanted to do everything ESK was doing -- crawling, babbling, sitting in her baby car seat. And SK and I were amazed with her talking ability. All in all a lot of fun.

I also made a quick jaunt up to the Big Apple to see some friends and spend some time with auntie L. It was great to be back in bustling Manhattan, but I have to admit, doing anything in "the city" with a baby is a pain in the butt. I didn't see as many people as I would have liked, or do as many things (like shoppping!) as I had planned, but it was good to be back in my old neighborhood.

In Remembrance

So while I was in New York, I had just put ESK down for a nap in my sister's downtown apartment. All of a sudden, I heard the sound of drums and the wail of a bagpipe. I was kind of annoyed since I thought it might wake ESK up. But then I realized it was a parade in memory of the fallen 9/11 police officers and fire fighters going through the neighborhood. I actually woke ESK up and took her outside to see the parade go by.

I was really moved by the parade and fought back tears a few times. I was a little caught off-guard by my own reaction. It's been six years now since I was standing on a corner on my way to work and I saw the second plane fly over my head and into the tower. I remember I instinctively started running away from the towers and to my office, just to get to a land line (cell phones were not working). I called my mom and then my poor sister RBK at her office, who had to hear me break down over the phone.

For awhile, I was pretty messed up about everything that happened that day, even though I didn't personally know anyone who was killed and I myself did not suffer any bodily harm. I used to get anxious if I saw anything related to planes and graphic pictures of the attack. But I do believe I'm over it. This year, I flew cross-country on September 11 (I didn't realize until I printed out my e-ticket the night before). I believe I'm healed, but there will always be a small corner of my heart that will feel this unexplainable sorrow about that day.