Random Thought and Addendum

Sometimes in the morning, when ESK is bounding around full of energy, I keep her busy by turning on the TV. I know, she's not yet two years old and she's not supposed to watch the ol' boob tube. But in the a.m., I've still got crust in my eyes and am totally useless until my first cup of coffee (motherhood has addicted me to coffee). Hope she doesn't become one of those TV zombie children, although it may be already to late for that. Oh well.

So, part of the morning line-up is "Handy Manny", a show about a cheery Latino fix-it man and his coterie of talking tools. I'm sure you moms are very familiar with the show. And so my random thought today is: I think the writers of the show put this undercurrent of sexual tension between Manny and Kelly, the comely hardware shop owner. The other day, I was listening to the dialogue and here's what I heard:

Tool 1 (with enthusiasm): Kelly will probably have what you need at her store!
Tool 2 (snidely): Kelly has EVERYTHING Manny needs...

I know there are other little bits here and there that are suggestive like this, but this is the only one that comes to mind. Am I totally crazy?

Addendum
I re-read my last post and wanted to clarify a few points. I am not belittling these women who have these life problems. In fact, I don't know what I would do if I was faced with the same issues in my own life.

But I guess the last post was just a selfish and self-absorbed rant. I want friends to provide light-hearted entertainment and companionship for me. Maybe what I'm looking for is just activity partners, and not true friendship. Yes, sometimes I do feel that these women are just unloading their baggage on me out of sheer loneliness. But also, aren't these shared thoughts and life stories the basis of real friendships? And I know as an isolated mom, I've had my own moments of verbal diarrhea.

Which brings me to another point that my sister and I discussed the other day. Is motherhood always lonely? Or is this loneliness just a part of getting older and growing up? With increased responsibilities, I do get the feeling you get wrapped up in managing your own life and family, whereas when I was younger and unattached, I could drop anything to go hang with friends. What do you think?

Random Pictures

Just realized I have not posted any pics in awhile. Here are a few from our last trip:

Bathtime fun with cousin GMK



Hanging with the cuz



I LOVE watermelon

Got Issues?

It's nice to have companionship, but lately, I've been wondering, "At what cost?" I've recently noticed that nearly all of my new female friends here in PDX have some kind of deep issues or difficulties in their lives. I know I have some issues, but the problems that these women face are much greater than mine. I hate to air their personal business, so I won't include any details, but they either dealt with serious medical issues, death, or, on the more prosaic side, flakiness (although SK suspects bipolar disorder or schizophrenia).

As I reflect on this, I realize the situation is pretty funny. I'm not sure how I've managed to put together such a motley crue. Actually, none of them have met each other (about three women so far), but frankly, I'm afraid to introduce them.

Why can't I meet any normal women? I know, I know... What is "normal", right? But I guess what I'm really looking for is someone who I feel I can relate to. And there is certainly something each of these women have that I have in common with. One recently moved to Portland with her husband and 15-month-old daughter, just around the time we did. The other is an ex-New Yorker, just like me. And the other is Korean-American.

I guess I'm looking for someone I have more in common with than just these minor things and I guess it'll take time!

Recap

Gosh, so much has happened and I don't even know where to begin. I guess I'll just spew out some random thoughts on my trip back East:

Plane rides
Flying with a baby is such a crap shoot! I feel like we have tried every permutation of flying cross-country with her. Flying at night direct, flying during the daytime direct, flying during the daytime or nighttime with a layover, snacks, books, surprise toys (new toy introduced on the flight)... There's no telling when she'll be a little angel and when she'll decide to be crankmonster.

During this last flight, we woke at 4 a.m. for a 6 a.m. flight. She was mildly cranky on our first flight because she was tired. I was hoping she'd sleep during the second flight, but instead she wanted to run up and down the aisle. You know in the cartoons when you see machines starting to whirr out of control and steam starts streaming out until finally the machine just blows up? That's what I felt like ESK was doing. She was twisting out of my arms, climbing all over me, even scratching my face.

I was ecstatic when the plane landed and happy to let her run around the spacious and relatively empty Portland airport. But I still had the get our bags -- one 60+ lb. suitcase (which I paid extra to check-in) and ESK's car seat which was in a protective backpack. As I pushed ESK in a stroller in front of me, pulled the suitcase behind me and strapped the car seat to my back, people were kinda chuckling because I looked so silly. Another onlooker told me I looked like a sherpa. I wish someone could have taken a picture because I think I would have laughed as well.

Old & New Tricks
ESK's favorite word these days is "up". She says "up" when she wants to be picked up, when we're carrying her and she wants to be put down, and when she's seated and wants to run around. Lately, she's been saying it with a very commanding tone to her voice. "Uuuu-PUH!" Cracks me up.

While we were back East, she learned a lot of new tricks from her two grandmas and even her cousin GMK:

1) winking -- of course she ends up shutting both eyes; priceless
2) tickling -- learned from GMK; wiggle fingers around your neck and says, "ticka ticka"
3) finding nose -- touches nose when asked "where's your nose?"
4) peekaboo -- covers parts of her face (not necessarily eyes) with 2 hands and uncovers
5) "cheese" -- also courtesy of GMK; says something closer to "chee" when I take a picture
6) traveling up and down stairs (we don't have stairs in our apartment)

AND much much more.

When her dad saw her again in Portland, he couldn't believe how much she had grown -- physically and in every other way. She's really starting to look like a little girl!

I'll post pics of my trip soon...